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Tampilkan postingan dengan label What Not To Say. Tampilkan semua postingan
Tampilkan postingan dengan label What Not To Say. Tampilkan semua postingan

Sabtu, 06 November 2010

What Not to Say to a Single ( or Newly Single ) Person..

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Don’t say: “You were too good for him.”
Why: You are basically saying she has bad taste. And you’ll be embarrassed if they ever patch it up.
Instead say: “His loss!” It gets the same point across without disparaging her judgment.

Don’t say: “I’m glad you got rid of him. I never liked him anyway.”
Why: She’ll wonder about your fake adoration for him while they were together.
Instead say: “I’m confident you’ll find someone who will give you exactly what you want.” It focuses on what’s to come, not on the dud you’re glad she’s done with.

Don’t say: “How could someone as perfect as you still be single?”
Why: A statement like this comes off as a backhanded compliment. What she hears is “What’s wrong with you?”
Instead say: “Seeing anyone?” If she’s tight-lipped about her love life, move on to other topics.

Expert: Bethany Marshall, Ph.D., a psychotherapist in Beverly Hills and the author of Deal Breakers: When to Work On a Relationship and When to Walk Away

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http://aywants.wordpress.com/


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What Not to Say During a Fight with Your Beloved..

Don’t say: “You always” or “You never” or “You’re a [slob, jerk]” or “You’re wrong.”
Why: Speaking in absolutes like “you always” and “you’re wrong” is playing the blame game, and resorting to name calling makes your partner feel helpless, which puts him on the defensive and makes a bad fight worse.
Instead say: “I’m upset that you left the dishes in the sink again. What can we do so that this stops happening?” Starting with the pronoun I puts the focus on how you feel, not why he’s in the doghouse, and it will make him more receptive to fixing the problem.

Don’t say: “If you really loved me, you would…”
Why: The more you treat your partner as if he’ll never satisfy you, the less satisfied you’ll be. Controlling your partner by imploring him to do something isn’t a good way to build intimacy.
Instead say: “I feel taken for granted when you don’t help around the house. I would feel better if we could…” The best way to keep a productive fight from becoming a dirty one is to be clear about why you’re upset and then offer a solution.

Expert: Terrence Real, a family therapist in Newton, Massachusetts.

sumber:

http://aywants.wordpress.com/


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What Not to Say During a Job Interview

Don’t say: “My current boss is horrendous.”
Why: It’s unprofessional. Your interviewer might wonder when you’d start bad-mouthing her. For all you know, she and your current boss are old pals.
Instead say: “I’m ready for a new challenge” or a similarly positive remark.

Don’t say: “Do you think I’d fit in here?”
Why: You’re the interviewee, not the interviewer.
Instead say: “What do you enjoy about working here?” By all means ask questions, but prepare ones that demonstrate your genuine interest in the company.

Don’t say: “What are the hours like?” or “What’s the vacation policy?”
Why: You want to be seen as someone who focuses on getting the job done.
Instead say: “What’s the day-to-day like here?” Then, if you’ve really jumped through every hoop and time off still hasn’t been mentioned, say, “Can you tell me about the compensation and benefits package?”

Expert: Mary Mitchell, president of the Mitchell Organization, a corporate-etiquette training firm in Seattle, and author of The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Etiquette


sumber:

http://aywants.wordpress.com/


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